Remember December...

You know those days you have...
days where you're hooking up a new tailgate for your unfixed abode.
A day where you've been parked under a tree for nine hours, the sound of munched droewors inside your face, reading the long awaited last issue of Baltimore: The Curse Bells and Hellboy: House of the Living Dead, generally testing out the long-term livability of your van.
Smelling like the panelbeater's in-season dog, and trying t' feed crows baby clams near the bus stop.
It's good to be passing thru...

Those days you have...
when it's the last day of 2011, you're dressed in your best Zelda shirt, drinking litres o' Crystal Spring water and testing various features of the vehicle, last minute touch-ups, fingers black and masculine with tar and grease as you unscrew an inside panel, changing your tailgate lock in an awkward, fiddly position.
The whole time reminded of your last similar labour of love - the arcade machine.

You know those days, where every two hours some passerby wishes you "Happy New Year", or every four hours some 13yr old kid asks you for a cigarette...
One o' those days where, when tinkering with aforementioned van, you can't help but overhear some 8yr old ask his Mum, "Are we gonna' have a smoke?".
To have her slur out at you, "Schlappy Nhew Eyeahr, DoOOooOOd!'', suddenly realizing it's weed the kids talking about as you look up to see Mum - suddenly two metres away from you, wobbling like a weevil and - oh ho! - now vomiting in a bush having given you a decidedly scary grin.
Charm.

One a' them days where, because you're not bastard enough, you offer an irresponsible Mum some water because you cannot grant her barely comprehensive request for a tissue, making a vivid mental note to keep that cup in van quarantine until you can cleanse it by fire back at the flat... simultaneously declining an offer from Drunk Mum's Friend of poorly rolled, crumby pocket joints, thrust in your face by a bandaged hand..., "We'ah arr gowin' to thah beEech, yooo shilld come, DooOod!"

Really? Really? Two 'pyjama-clad' Mothers with a pocket full of cannabis and a mouth full of throw-up, barely capable of standing or speaking coherent English, are taking two children near a huge body of water and bustling crowds of strangers... at 7:30pm ... to celebrate past midnight. Good luck.


- 10 Hardest Things About December 2011 -

* Getting out of bed.
* Getting sufficient sleep despite that.
* Doin' stuff... theoretically.
* Successfully completing the doin' of stuff, for stuff your doin'.
* Being awake when you need to sleep.
* Being asleep when you need to wake.
* Convincing your partner nocturnal people have rights too.
* Being 'conventionally' good, while being 'actually' good at same time.
* Oh yeah.. that whole Christmas thing.
* Keeping secrets.

Shut up, you're random!

"A fear of the dark and a fear of not seeing are quite different.'' - Rihia2k