...or, Lust in Trenslation.
It shouldn't be that hard.
A mere 2504.35km South East across the water and, voila! I'm home.
In fact, it isn't that hard.
-"Horticultural experiment, now what did I say?"
-"Horticultural experiment, sir."
-"Good. Relevant economics?"
-"Why, Relevant economics, I heard."
-"How about, number six..."
-"..."
-"Hello?"
-"..."
-"Hello?!"
Maybe, just maybe, it's the accent.
You
see, big words aren't the stumbling block, but I've been sent to the
stationery section of a store when I asked if they had any pins.
Apparently I'd been misunderstood as asking for a pen, which is pronounced 'pan'.
Heaven forbid I ever need to enquire about an actual pan because I have
no clue what pronounciation options I'm left with. I think, at any rate
frying-pan works out as 'payen'.
Secretly I love it, and I'll compile a kiwi/aussie comparison list shortly.
What I don't love so much is when it gets numerical...
-"...and your phone number, sir?"
-"Sure, my mobile number is oh-four-one-nine-double six-double...um, hello?"
-"..."
What they heard is 'sex' in place o' 'six', it's a retarded in-joke across the Tasman.
Okay, okay I do pronounce 'fish' as 'fush', 'his' as 'hus', 'cat' as 'cet', etc.
Still, I get held up with an ,"I'm sorry?"
- "Six"
- "Was that six?"
... of course it was bloody six...
In relaying numbers, what are the chances I said,"5, 4, 8, 8,
sexual intercourse, sexual intercourse, 9, 3, 2"?
Slim I hope.
In fact, Aussie is such a slang-loving country, if I said ""5, 4, 8, 8, double rumpy-pumpy chiko roll, 9, 8, 8, silk purse from a sow's ear", I'd be perfectly understood.
So...
adaptive as I am, I'm learning to adjust my 'sixes' to 'seexes', my
'thimbles' to theembles', and a two syllable word that risks ending
itself in 'r' gets the 'ah' treatment. ie. lawy-ah, doct-ah, guvn-ah.
-"And what do you do for a living, Mrs. Gillard?"
-"Oh, I'm the Prime Minist-ah. Want some chiko roll?"
-"Nice."
-"Hmm, Might pick up some Bundy from the Bottle-O before I hit Dubbo by way a' Coonabarabran to get rooted with my old mate."
and now...
Rihia2k's thoroughly unhelpful and short list of Ocker to Kiwi translations;
****expletive bastardisation of english language warning****
- Ocker "f*ck off" = Kiwi "oh how interesting"
- Ocker "foowill" = Kiwi "fool"
- Ocker "scheeuwl" = Kiwi "school''
- Ocker "too easy, mate" = Kiwi "Ive looked into it & I'll eventually get around to it"
- Ocker "poet's friday" = Kiwi "dropping absolutely everything pending to leave work two hours early and get recreational / unconcious / intoxicated"
- Ocker "c*nt" = Kiwi "any human being, animal, object or plant"
- Ocker "bevan / bogan" = Kiwi "a casual person / the Prime Minister"
- Ocker "no worries" = Kiwi "may be used in place of any actual proper sentence"
- Ocker "How ya going?" = Kiwi "I notice you have a crossbow bolt in your eye, and a spanner in your spleen but I like your bicycle"
Heck, enough o' that, it's just too easy to rip into
another language's lingo and pronunciation when it's so close to your
own. Y'know what? Sometimes there's nothing quite as novel and foreign as that
which is so very very similar, but undeniably different.
Greater political and cultural issues aside, Aussies are for the most part, nice, easy-going,
casual people, definitely willing to lend a hand. (I find this is in some part due to my chameleon level adaptability, if I may be so immodest: Jack of All People - Master of No-one.)
The Aussie loves nothing if not a good
yarn, to chew the fat, and I believe that it's the embracing of their cultural eccentricities
that help these young western worlders from going truly insane.
Sorry, I mean Eensane.
"Being from a bi-cultural background, nothing cuts me up worse than a rascist cannibal" - rihia2k.
heh heh, geddit?
