This life is a car trip ...

Yes, a while since my last post. So concerned you were, I can tell. And on the subject of concern:-

New Zealand (fear not it's still here). Small as it is, the country hasn't blown itself off of the world map.

....

Thought I'd spong on (spong?) during this entry about my country's quaintness & quietness.

Let's start real simple like. New Zealand or Aotearoa (Land of the Long White Cloud) is situated in the southern hemisphere. Yeah, we is not all that far from Antarctica.

It consists of two main islands, excitingly named North Island & South Island in english. Or in maori: Te Ika A Maui (The Fish of Maui) & Te Waka A Maui (The Canoe of Maui).

Maui is by the way, one particularly kick-ass trickster demigod, and one of the all-time most entertaining characters from oceanic mythology. Research that jazz, baby. But I am bias.

Back to my point: this country is, what 1600 kilometres north n' south? But what I really dig is that east and west coasts are 200 km or so apart (as the crow flies) on average. Give or take depending, but it means ocean sunrises and sunsets aren't exactly hard t' find.

That was some very Han Solo geography btw, Googlemap it in case I navigate you to Mordor.

Population time, Nien Nunb: 4,382,196.

And most o' these are packed together, moths to the light of city living. Safety, opportunity, entertainment, and industry in numbers, sure. But what I really don't understand are those that have a 0.1% interest in getting outta' the city. I've met many over time, and it's a shame to think they won't suffer the necessary billboard withdrawals and no-neon-shakes to see what the stars really look like with no light pollution.

But then again... that means one don' gotta get far to have the whole beach to oneself.

So took a brief drive round earlier this year... might 's well share some of the generic, less personal photos...

Ah, Bulls. Yes the wee town of Bulls. Located on the lower west of the North Island. I hadn't been here for a time. Once was a few signs up that ended in '-bull'. Now they're e'erywhere. Mebbe time to reign this pun in.

Wanganui. (spelt Whanganui due to recent name change). I gotsa real love for this place. Not too large, not too small (okay, pretty small by most folks standards). But hey, kick yer fancy jandals off and let ya bad haircut down, yer on the west coast now, baby. Cas-u-al. Yup, cemetary is pretty casual too.

It's nice to be different.

Below: this vege store has been exactly the same for thirty years.
I think they touched up the paint on the banana, but apart from that... Oh-riginal fruitsta. Deserves more tweets than Master Bieber. And you'll probably need to be over thirty or have my kinda memory to get the television reference they're making with 'Hill St. Greens' .... ha, Hill Street Greens .... it is to laugh (everytime). And as you can see it's rush hour ...

 
 If you can be bothered fighting through the crowds pictured below, and you're not too depressed about spending that whole .90 cents on copious amounts o' bananas n' peaches. You might even make it to the sunset...

"There's a feeling I get when I look to the west"-

Though I think you could safely attribute that feeling to the fact I grew up on this street.
It's incredible how little it's changed since the eighties. I can nearly see myself running down to the corner to buy my daily fix of GIJoe bubblegum cards. And getting my first bee sting...



Yes, sir. West is west. In little old Castlecliff beach, Wanganui, New Zealand. Darn crowds.

Yep, those're mine and m' girlfriends footprints, competing with our other pair of footprints. It's a two horse race...

 

Alright, on the road again, troubled by horrific scenes like this ... 

knew I shoulda stayed in my smelly capital city...



Aww, just geese. They won't hurt you.



Aah, tha's just an alpaca, nothing to be afraid of...

See this? This is a Killkill. Frickin' run.
Killkill, as it cutely informs you it's called ("Killkill Killkill"), builds up your confidence by paying a shy interest in your breadcrumbs and convincing you chooks are nothing to fear.

 And Bam! once your guard is down, they start coming outta' the woodwork. This is a very small portion of the actually alarming amount of chickens that marauded our campsite outside of Taupo. (central North Island, famous for it's lake, popular tourist and chicken victim spot).

These crazy birds even try to eat themselves.

But yes, be vigilant. My girl still bears a faint scar from a psychotic Killkill leaping onto her hot bowl of noodles and pouring them down her leg when my back was turned. I'll never forget that scream...

This kind of trauma could only be remedied by heading east ... to Havelock North, Hawkes Bay. Remedied by freshly picked strawberries. Remedied by a state of the art, talking public toilet that plays "What the world needs now" and threatens you with t-minus 10 minutes 'til it opens it's doors and reveals you defecating to the public. Mmm... strawberries.

Mmm... Lord Of The Ringsy flavour...

 And this, mon ami, is Waimarama. One tres beau eastern point of the North Island! You really cannot go wrong to be here. One o' those first places to see the sun, and you can just feel it had no-one even toldja'.

 

And that's that, slightly up the west coast and back down the east in a tiny circle. No real stressing for time necessary, coupla' days and back to work with a world full o' chill factor and a new perspective on whatever tired ole street you grind in.

Just a coupla' pics from two more little settlements on the drive home. "Welcome to Waipawa."
Nope seriously, they won't miss you if ya jurst keep drivin' on...

 Aww, see, Waipawa? even Masterton, which ain't exactly mighty, saw fit to have a bug mosaic... as opposed to a crushed cockroach under a plastic sign.

Well, folks. Welcome to North Island New Zealand.

"Those that dare to conform can be those who bring the most original ideas to fruition"
(basically ignore that, just wanted to use 'dare to conform' in a sentence)
- Rihia2k.