What some folk won't do to get in the news.
Earlier this year, in Good ol' New Zealand, a lady went to the media to "complain" that she'd purchased a tin of Budget brand pears only to find shock horror, that one of these hard earned fruit slices was engraved with a 'demonic' picture perfect smiley-face.
Oh, the humanity! Oh the mental anguish! Oh the ... hmm, free pears I'm sensing ...
So sure enough this dame wound up with pears out her ears as compensation, a spot on the national news, and a piece of fruit that smiles. But no satisfaction of ever catching the tinning terrorist, the grocery guerilla that was responsible for the deed.
I don't scour the fruit-graffitti section of the newspaper frequently enough to have actually read about it at the time, oh no the article was brought to my attention later ...
Flashing back: Shoppin' done, I'm leaving the supermarket with my girlfriend, we've both had our days fill o' work & maturity, and need instant gratification. So she's driving the car getting hand fed lollies (sweets, candy or what you will). But shock horror -
Now New Zealand, with it's tiny island complex, has something of an identity crisis, this country needs to lay claim to anything it can. Fush & chups (thats ours), beer & barbecues (only us), utes & gumboots (back off there) and our confectionary views are no different. Most folks parents and grandparents will remember the lollies that define us as a nation:-
*milk bottles*wine gums
*jet planes
* ahem... eskimo lolliesYup, I'm sure the diabetics of earth are perfectly happy with their twinkies and tea cakes, but these are our exclusively kiwi treats (we tell ourselves ... on television).
Do NOT attempt to feed one of these to your girlfriend while she is driving. She WILL laugh.
You WILL crash, it is NOT a smiley face.
What part of the eskimo is this?
So it sure didn't turn out looking like these... medieval sarcophagi, powdery marshmallow thangs. And okay, I'm willing to accept that it may have been a robo-sculpting glitch rather than a spotty, underpaid 17yr old employee messing with the mould. But seriously, Pascall's is one o' NZ's most successful confectionary companies, big time. You think they'd pay a bouncer to stand at the production line, ensuring that when my eyesight fails me I don't end up putting one of these on my daughters birthday cake.
Finally, I'll apologise for referring to that lolly earlier as a midget eskimo. But the correct term: inuit small person lolly, doesn't seem to market so well. Also if you act too p.c. around these parts people get suspicious, and you wake up assaulted by homophobes.
"Dreams are free, until you decide to follow them" - Rihia2k
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